There are so many factors and so many walls to hit in international adoption that your head spins. One thing about China that you don't fear is the birth mother. The children are left, with no contact as it is illegal in China to abandon your baby. But in Taiwan, it is different, there is a birth mom and she in many cases has to do that final letting go.
Trenton's birth mom did her final letting go today. I had wrote a letter last week begging for her to understand that we would be the parents she would want for her son and that we would love him as much as she would and that we would never let him forget her... I had to dig down in my soul to make sure when I said those words I really did mean them because I love my children and I want my children to love only me as their mom... but then I have never had to wear these shoes.
So after sitting her for a few hours and making sure that I was able to put into words on a peice of paper who I was, who we were as a family and how important having Trenton as MY son... I also had to feel for her and know that I would never take him away from her, completely.
So today the social worker took Trenton over to the jail to see him mom and to give her the letter that I wrote (Wendy translated it for me and made sure that the English to Chinese was done completely right)
And the birth mom said she was very happy that I wanted to love her son and that she wanted me to be his mom.
I opened this email first thing this morning and have been flying on cloud nine all day!
She asked the social worker to ask me to send her pictures of him and letters to her about him. And I have fully agreed to this as I want him to know her and I want to know her. I want Trenton to know that he wasn't given up because he wasn't loved but because of situations in his mom life.
I can not wait to get that baby in my arms!
Chase just got home from a two week trip with Grandma yesteday. We haven't told them yet as we wanted to make 100% sure this was happening...
You should see him and Ali together! I know siblings fight but they REALLY missed each other!! Ali will not let Chase (or Chasey as she calls him) out of her sight.
This is what life is all about!
This is the story of Ginnie and Jay from the beginning of our journey to Alexis and on to our trials for a second child. This story also includes our life as parents with our other children.
OUR BOY
5 months old
He's rough and he's tough and he's ours!
Alexis
Referral
Alexis
One Year Later
Our Timeline
09/21/07- Letter of Intent to China for Wei
10/23/07-Applied to CIS for 171-H
11/10/07-Finger Prints
12/05/07-Turned Down from CCAA for Wei
12/20/07-Home Study Completed for Taiwan
12/21/07 -Home Study to Taiwan-Logged in
01/05/07-Home Study to CIS
???? Mailed Almost complete Dossier to ASIA
01/26/08-Approved 171-H
02/25/08-Phone call that CCAA was looking our file over again!!!!
03/25/08- Email From ASIA that CCAA said NO.
5 Months and 3 Weeks since our Home Study was completed for Taiwan
06/08/08- Was contacted that there was a little BOY for adoption
06/10/08-Received photos of OUR CHILD
06/15/08-Was asked to give him a name! PRAISE GOD!
06/16/08-Sent in application for orphanage in Taiwan
10/23/07-Applied to CIS for 171-H
11/10/07-Finger Prints
12/05/07-Turned Down from CCAA for Wei
12/20/07-Home Study Completed for Taiwan
12/21/07 -Home Study to Taiwan-Logged in
01/05/07-Home Study to CIS
???? Mailed Almost complete Dossier to ASIA
01/26/08-Approved 171-H
02/25/08-Phone call that CCAA was looking our file over again!!!!
03/25/08- Email From ASIA that CCAA said NO.
5 Months and 3 Weeks since our Home Study was completed for Taiwan
06/08/08- Was contacted that there was a little BOY for adoption
06/10/08-Received photos of OUR CHILD
06/15/08-Was asked to give him a name! PRAISE GOD!
06/16/08-Sent in application for orphanage in Taiwan
My Favorite Adoption Blogs and Websites
Legacy of an Adopted Child
Once there were two women
Who never knew each other.
One you do not remember,
The other you call mother.
Two different lives shaped to make you one.
One became your guiding star,
The other became your sun.
The first one gave you life
And the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love,
The second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality,
The other gave you a name.
One gave you a talent,
The other gave you aim.
One gave you emotions,
The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile,
The other dried your tears.
One sought for you a home
That she could not provide,
The other prayed for a child
And her hope was not denied.
And now you ask me through your tears,
The age-old question unanswered
Through the years…
Heredity or environment…
Which are you a product of?
Neither, my darling. Neither.
Just two different kinds of love.
- author unknown
Who never knew each other.
One you do not remember,
The other you call mother.
Two different lives shaped to make you one.
One became your guiding star,
The other became your sun.
The first one gave you life
And the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love,
The second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality,
The other gave you a name.
One gave you a talent,
The other gave you aim.
One gave you emotions,
The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile,
The other dried your tears.
One sought for you a home
That she could not provide,
The other prayed for a child
And her hope was not denied.
And now you ask me through your tears,
The age-old question unanswered
Through the years…
Heredity or environment…
Which are you a product of?
Neither, my darling. Neither.
Just two different kinds of love.
- author unknown
Life Is Too Short
'Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it.Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.' Harvey Mackay
You Know You're An Adoptive Parent When...
1. The fact that there are 143 million children without a parent to kiss them goodnight has made you lose sleep.
2. You realize DNA has nothing to do with love and family.
3. You can't watch Adoption Stories on TLC without sobbing.
4. The fact that, if 7% of Christians adopted 1 child there would be no orphans in the world, is convicting to you.
5. You spend free time surfing blogs about families who have experienced the blessing of adoption.
6. It drives you crazy when people ask you about adopted child's 'real' parents.
7. You have ever been 'pregnant' with your adoptive child longer than it takes an elephant to give birth.(2 years!)
8. You had no idea how you would afford to adopt but stepped out in faith anyway, knowing where God calls you He will provide.
9. You have ever taken an airplane ride half-way around the world with a child you just met.
10. You believe God's heart is for adoption.
11. You realize that welcoming a child into your heart and family is one of the most important legacies you could ever leave on this earth.
12. You know what the word 'Dossier' means, and you can actually pronounce it!
13. You have welcomed a social worker into the most private parts of your life.
14. You shudder when people say your child is so lucky that you adopted them, knowing full well you are the blessed one to have him or her in your life.
-Author unknown
2. You realize DNA has nothing to do with love and family.
3. You can't watch Adoption Stories on TLC without sobbing.
4. The fact that, if 7% of Christians adopted 1 child there would be no orphans in the world, is convicting to you.
5. You spend free time surfing blogs about families who have experienced the blessing of adoption.
6. It drives you crazy when people ask you about adopted child's 'real' parents.
7. You have ever been 'pregnant' with your adoptive child longer than it takes an elephant to give birth.(2 years!)
8. You had no idea how you would afford to adopt but stepped out in faith anyway, knowing where God calls you He will provide.
9. You have ever taken an airplane ride half-way around the world with a child you just met.
10. You believe God's heart is for adoption.
11. You realize that welcoming a child into your heart and family is one of the most important legacies you could ever leave on this earth.
12. You know what the word 'Dossier' means, and you can actually pronounce it!
13. You have welcomed a social worker into the most private parts of your life.
14. You shudder when people say your child is so lucky that you adopted them, knowing full well you are the blessed one to have him or her in your life.
-Author unknown
1 comment:
....continuing to follow your journey ....
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